The Movie Waffler The Movie Waffler

New Release Review - Jesus Henry Christ

Directed by: Dennis Lee
Starring: Toni Collette, Michael Sheen, Jason Spevack, Samantha Weinstein

Spevack is a kid with the second highest ever recorded IQ who tracks down Sheen, his sperm donor father.

New Release Review - The Divide

Directed by: Xavier Gens
Starring: Lauren German, Michael Biehn, Milo Ventimiglia, Courtney B. Vance, Rosanna Arquette, Michael Eklund

Following a nuclear attack on New York, a group of survivors hole up in the basement of their apartment block. Tensions run high and eventually they give in to the most primal instincts of humanity.

New Release Review - Battleship

Directed by: Peter Berg
Starring: Alexander Skarsgård, Brooklyn Decker, Liam Neeson, Rhianna, Taylor Kitsch, Peter MacNicol

The Hasbro board game finally gets the movie adaptation we've all been waiting for.

New Release Review - The Cabin In The Woods

Directed by: Drew Goddard
Starring: Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Jesse Williams, Amy Acker

A bunch of college kids, closely resembling the Scooby Doo gang, head off to the titular retreat for a weekend of fun. Little do they know that their every move is being manipulated by Whitford and Jenkins, part of an underground network who keep the world safe by sacrificing young people to subterranean Gods.

New Release Review - Gone

Directed by: Heitor Dhalia
Starring: Amanda Seyfried, Jennifer Carpenter, Wes Bentley, Daniel Sunjata, Joel David Moore

Having been abducted herself a year previously, Seyfried takes the law into her own hands when her sister disappears. 

New Release Review - God Bless America

Directed by: Bobcat Goldthwait
Starring: Joel Murray, Tara Lynne Barr, Mackenzie Brooke Smith

Diagnosed with a tumour, Murray sets off on a murderous rampage, killing those he blames for society's ills while accompanied by like-minded teen Barr.

New Release Review - Le Havre

Directed by: Aki Kaurismaki
Starring: André Wilms, Kati Outinen, Blondin Miguel, Jean-Pierre Darroussin

Affable shoe-shine man Wilms takes up the cause of illegal immigrant Miguel who is seeking passage from the title port to join his mother in London.

Pre-Code Retrospective - Illicit (1931)

Directed by: Archie Mayo
Starring: Barbara Stanwyck, James Rennie, Ricardo Cortez, Joan Blondell, Charles Butterworth, Natalie Moorhead

After allowing herself to be pressured into marriage, liberal society girl Stanwyck's fears of the "sacred institution" are realised.

New Release Review - The Cold Light Of Day

Directed by: Mabrouk El Mechri
Starring: Henry Cavill, Bruce Willis, Sigourney Weaver, Verónica Echegui

Usually this is where I try to sum up the plot in a neat sentence but seeing as how this movie doesn't have one I'm kind of stuck.

New Release Review - Stockholm Ostra (Stockholm East)

Directed by: Simon Kaijser
Starring: Mikael Persbrandt, Iben Hjejle, Henrik Norlen, Liv Mjones

Persbrandt becomes romantically involved with Hjejle, unbeknownst to her he is the driver who killed her young daughter in a road accident.

New Release Review - 4:44 Last Day On Earth

Directed by: Abel Ferrara
Starring: Willem Dafoe, Shanyn Leigh, Natasha Lyonne

Dafoe and Leigh moap around their New York loft as they await the end of the world, due to arrive at 4:44 the next morning.

New Release Review - Play

Directed by: Ruben Ostlund
Starring: Kevin Vaz, Yannick Diakité, Abdiaziz Hilowle

Based on a series of real life incidents in Gothenburg, Sweden, Ostlund's film tells the story of how a group of young black kids were allowed to consistently mug children in broad daylight.

First Time Watches - March 2012

Blood Runs Cold (2011)
The best I can say about this godawful Norwegian Swedish slasher is that it looks a lot more expensive than the paltry $5000 spent on it.

TV Review - Game Change

Directed by: Jay Roach
Starring: Julianne Moore, Ed Harris, Woody Harrelson, Peter MacNicol, Sarah Paulson, Ron Livingston

Harris and Moore are John McCain and Sarah Palin in this HBO dramatization of their failed election campaign.

New Release Review - The Kid With A Bike

Directed by: Jean-Pierre Dardenne & Luc Dardenne
Starring: Thomas Doret, Cécile De France, Jérémie Renier, Egon Di Mateo

Following a chance encounter, hairdresser De France allows wild child Doret to leave his juvenile home and stay with her at the weekends. Upon discovering the child's father,Renier, wants nothing to do with him, she takes him into her care on a permanent basis, battling to keep him on the straight and narrow, and away from local drug dealer Di Mateo.

TV Review - Leprechaun's Revenge

Directed by: Drew Daywalt
Starring: Billy Zane, William Devane, Courtney Halverson

After plucking a red four leaf clover in the woods, Halverson awakens a centuries old Leprechaun who is intent on stealing all the gold from the local townsfolk.

Pre-Code Retrospective - Safe In Hell (1931)

Directed by: William Wellman
Starring: Dorothy MacKaill, Donald Cook, Ralf Harolde, Nina Mae McKinney, Morgan Wallace

MacKaill is a prostitute who, thinking herself responsible for the death of a client, flees with the aid of her lover to a remote caribbean island.

New Release Review - Once Upon A Time In Anatolia

Directed by: Nuri Bilge Ceylan
Starring: Muhammet Uzuner, Yilmaz Erdogan, Taner Birsel

A bunch of grizzled cops spend the night driving through the Turkish countryside, a couple of murder suspects in tow, as they search for the burial site of their victim.

New Release Review - The Hunger Games

Directed by: Gary Ross
Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Woody Harrelson, Josh Hutcherson, Elizabeth Banks, Stanley Tucci, Lenny Kravitz, Liam Hemsworth