Review by
Eric Hillis
Directed by: Rachel Lambert
Starring: Daisy Ridley, Dave Merheje, Parvesh Cheena, Marcia DeBonis
We're all aliens masquerading as humans; some of us just pull it off
more convincingly than others. When we emerge from the womb we might as
well be crash-landing on a distant world. We know nothing of our new
surroundings, or the people that inhabit it. But if we want to survive
we need to start blending in. Keep your head down and never reveal
what's really under your human skin suit. History tells us that people
who stand out don't tend to fare too well on planet Earth.
But some people just don't feel comfortable wearing human skin. Or as a
character in director Rachel Lambert's
Sometimes I Think About Dying puts it, "It's hard, isn't
it, being a person?"
Fran (Daisy Ridley) struggles with being a person, and with
being around other people. The mundanity of her life as an office drone
is enlivened by elaborate fantasies of dying, visualised by Lambert in
the manner of Bud Cort's fake suicide attempts in
Harold & Maude (in this respect this would make a
great double bill with Carolina Cavalli's
Amanda): a giant crane outside her office window becomes a gallows; a snake
creeps up on her while working; she's burned alive on a beach etc. Her
co-workers are a friendly bunch but Fran lurks on their periphery,
displaying perhaps the superiority complex that so often fuels
introversion. They're constantly joking but they never make Fran laugh.
The office, all harsh fluorescent lights and unadorned corridors, would
drive most people mad, but Fran isn't bothered by her physical
surroundings so much as having to share the space with other
people.
Fran is shook from her stupor by the arrival of new employee Robert (Dave Merheje). He makes jokes, but his puns are clever. When asked by his new boss
to tell the room something he enjoys, he replies with "uncomfortable
silences," causing Fran to giggle while her co-workers react like an AI
asked a question it hasn't been programmed to comprehend.
When Fran accepts Robert's invitation to go see a movie, it sparks an
offbeat, complicated romance that's as much will-they-should-they as
will-they-won't-they. Robert's extroverted personality brings Fran out
of her shell (in one charming scene she wins the hearts of his friends
by describing one of her elaborate death fantasies as part of a party
game) but Fran has convinced herself that she couldn't possibly be
interesting to another person to such a degree that she's in danger of
living down to her low self-esteem. Attempts to make small talk on
Robert's part are met with angry rebuttals and accusations of prying.
Yet she's clearly attracted to him. Fran wants to live quietly in
Robert's space without having to be a person for him. Unfortunately
that's something you only get to do when a relationship has developed.
The dating stage requires you to be a person, even if you have to be
someone else. It's exhausting, isn't it?
Ridley is really only known for her role in the
Star Wars franchise, so her performance here almost feels
like we're seeing her for the first time, and she's revelatory. She
proves herself a consummate screen actor, conveying multitudes through
simple physical gestures like angling her head in a manner that hides
her face, or moving her hands awkwardly like an alien who finds
themselves possessing fingers for the first time. Her performance is
reminiscent of Scarlett Johansson's turn in
Under the Skin, and while Ridley may not literally be playing an alien discovering
what it means to be human, she might as well be. Attractive stars can
often struggle when they have to play a "normie," but Ridley does a fine
job of convincing us that Fran doesn't realise that she looks like Daisy
Ridley.
While the movie's ethos may boil down to the simple statement that
being human is a lot of work but ultimately worth it, it doesn't sugar
coat things. As a potential love interest, Robert may be charming and
witty and willing to spend time with Fran when her self-hatred leads her
to lash out defensively at him, but we're never fully convinced that the
two belong together. There's enough evidence offered that Robert
probably won't be there for Fran when she needs him most, but for Fran
he's here now, and in our journey to become human sometimes we just need
someone to be with us in the present.
