A criminal is forced to pull off a heist to save the life of a former
lover.
Directed by: Max Adams
Starring: Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Bruce Willis, Claire
Forlani
Precious Cargo is a rare latter-day
Bruce Willis movie that received a theatrical release, but it's very
much the sort of B-grade action flick that would have debuted on the lower
shelves of Blockbuster 20 years ago, boasting a cast made up of (unfairly in
most cases) has-beens, never-weres and never-will-bes.
Mark-Paul Gosselaar (best known from his days on '90s sitcom
Saved by the Bell) plays Jack, a criminal
entrepreneur who somehow seems to have evaded arrest (the police never make
an appearance in this world) despite leaving a trail of corpses behind him.
When an ex lover of his, Karen (Claire Forlani, continuing the '90s
throwbacks), turns up out of the blue, he ends up being convinced to help
her pull off an armoured car robbery so she can pay off her debt to
dangerous mob boss Eddie (Willis). But can Karen really be trusted?
As has been the norm for a while now, Willis phones in his performance
here. Like Elvis on The Ed Sullivan Show, he's always filmed above the
waist, which got me wondering if Willis spent the entire shoot in a seated
position. The same can't be said of his co-stars though, whose energy and
enthusiasm goes above and beyond the call of duty for a script as mediocre
as this one.
Gosselaar oozes charisma, and makes for a convincingly charming rogue.
There's something of a more engaging Chris Pratt about him, and on the
strength of this he deserves a proper career revival. Forlani is really
enjoying playing the femme fatale here, and it's refreshing to see an
actress over the age of 40 given such a playful role. Young newcomer
Jenna B Kelly, whose only previous credit is another recent Willis
B-actioner, Extraction, is a standout
here as Gosselaar's mouthy sniper sidekick. Perennial bad guy
Daniel Bernhardt is a riot as Willis's henchman; a scene in which
he dishes out verbal abuse to his employer's bevy of silicon enhanced
bimbos is the film's highlight.
The movie appears to model itself on the
Fast & Furious template of a gang
of criminals who aren't really all that bad (even though they murder an
awful lot of people), but with an old school laissez faire attitude and a
far more sympathetic running time. Had this been made 40 years ago, Burt
Reynolds would have played Gosselaar's role (we even get a blooper reel
alongside the closing credits here).
The script is hackneyed, Willis is awful, and the action scenes are on
the level of a
Walker, Texas Ranger episode, but
there's an undeniable innocent charm about this little underdog that makes
it far more palatable than the majority of its bigger budgeted action
cousins.
Precious Cargo is on Prime Video UK
now.
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